Birthday Boy

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Both the Baylor Bears and the Chicago Bears posted birthday greetings on their Facebook pages of the man I used to be married to. I’ve actually only had one husband, but over the last 35 years I’ve known him, he’s been a few different men. The first guy is the one I met as an 18-year old freshman at Baylor;  a standout sophomore  linebacker who went on to become a standout middle linebacker for the Chicago Bears. At the time, he was all things football. Thoughts of how he could improve, his defense could improve and the team could improve occupied his mind at all times, including sleep. More than once I was awakened by a forearm to the head ~ ‘it was a trap play’ was all he’d say. Somehow I understood that the little bits of him were all he could give, and that was ok.

But once he hung up his jersey and cleats, he turned all the passion and intensity formerly reserved for football toward home. We had three kids under 6 and the 4th was born a few days after his last game. He was purposeful and intentional about his involvement in every facet of home life. E-v-e-r-y facet. His heart’s desire was to create the family dynamic of his dreams, with a quiver full of children whose father was both visible and available as a deeply impactful positive force in their lives. Which is exactly what he did. Over the course of time, he shed the dictatorial ideals that formed the foundation for his own upbringing to the servant leader that he is today. The man he is today holds the same spiritual convictions as the man I first knew, but his gentler ways have earned him the genuine respect and love from every member of this family, especially me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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And now, the new generation of Singletary grandchildren is upon us. As we did before we had our own children, we sat and discussed what kind of grandparents we’d be. His grandparents were not a positive factor in his life, while I count mine as some of my favorite people of all time, heaping unconditional love and support on me as long as they were alive. Not surprisingly, he strategized time and attention boundaries for our grandchildren, ‘so they always know that their Mimi and Papa love one another first, and won’t lose their minds over their grandkids.’ Nice plan. That is, until sweet Brooklynne arrived. Last month we had her with us for a week and on Friday night ~ his beloved movie night ~ he was happy to escort Brooklynne to the water park, hovering over her, drying her face when she got splashed, and enforcing proper space and distance after she went down the water slide, ready to go toe-to-toe with the bullying toddlers not willing to wait their turn. Once a linebacker, always a linebacker I guess. Those time and attention boundaries dissolved somewhere between the golf cart ride and the bedtime story on his lap.

The man I’m married to today is far better than I could have dreamed. Happy Birthday, my love.

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Comments

  1. Phil Dorr says:

    Awwww Kim you are pretty special as well. Love the blog and trust y’all have a truly special day today celebrating #63’s birthday!!!!! SIC ’em BEARS!!!

  2. Judy Lack says:

    Happy birthday Mike. Many blessings to you.

  3. Donna Crawford says:

    Good job Kim. He is special. Happy birthday Mike.
    With love and continued admiration.
    “Mrs. Crawford”

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